November 14, 2012

Out with the negativity

Day 14: Advice for dealing with negative feedback in your community

As bloggers we put ourselves out there.  We share very personal stories and memories.  We write from our hearts and about things we love.  About the good and the bad, the happy and the sad.  I for one love getting feedback.  I get emails that make me cry.  And comments that remind me why I am so open with my life.  But every now and the, the trolls move in.  Someone leaves a comment that I am only looking for pity or that no one cares.  There is always going to be people out there who try to bring others down.

I prefer just to ignore it.  I got a comment once from "anonymous" saying that no one wanted to read my sob story and then they went on to pick my post apart detail by detail.  At first I thought I shouldn't lose any sleep over it.  But no one had ever been so mean to me.  So I decided to write back.  I first asked why they would not just leave a name unless they were someone I knew.  In that case, how lame is it that they couldn't just admit their problem with me. Then I let them know that for someone who says they could care less to read my drama, they sure knew my story very well.  And I asked them to either keep their comments to themselves or say something to me personally. But to call me out on a comment on my blog, where everyone can see it, just seemed childish.  Especially since I knew it was just a bitter ex-friend.

After that I just stopped replying to them.  Delete the comments and move forward.  If it is more of a critique, then take a look at what the person is saying.  You have the choice to take their advice or to ignore it.  Sometimes it is just easier and better to take the high road and ignore it.  I feel like I am constantly telling my boys to just leave each other alone and walk away.  Seems like its the best advice there is.

One last thing, don't let the negativity get a hold of you.  Try your best to brush it off.  Its so easy to let it knock you down and second guess yourself but don't let it!  Be strong and be confident in yourself.

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